For all of our boys, we've chosen their middle name first. With Carter, we decided that we wanted his middle name to have some significance.. At the time, the most important day of our lives was our wedding day. Rev. Michael O'Reilly married us in South Lake Tahoe. It was a beautiful ceremony. Although we weren't close to Rev. O'Reilly, we used his last name as Carter's middle name to remind us of the importance of the day.
Coen's middle name at birth was Kwasi, but we kept it for more than that alone. In Ghana, everyone is given a middle name that is based on the day of the week they were born and if they are a boy or girl. So, all boys born on Sunday are given the name Kwasi (or a similar variation based on their region) for a middle name. Coen's middle name ties him to his heritege and helps us to tell his story of how he came to us.
With our third baby, we started with the middle name first. I don't remember exactly when it was decided, but it was early on. Maybe 8 or 9 weeks into the pregnancy. Having suffered the lost of two babies at 10 weeks gestation, I was more than nervous when we found out I was pregnant this time. My doctor agreed to an ultrasound at 7 weeks just as she had previously, but wouldn't do any sort of other testing for me prior. If I had low progesterone as I suspected, a simple ultrasound wouldn't show it and by 7 weeks, it might be too late to address it anyway. I started calling other doctor's offices, but no one would consider seeing me prior to 8 weeks - I had ONLY had 2 miscarriages, not 3 which constitutes a problem. Balling my eyes out, I called my friend, Nicole, who told me to call her Aunt Peggy. Peggy is a nurse practitioner and midwife. I called her office and after telling the office staff that I had already had 2 miscarriages they insisted I get in that very day for some testing. I was in the office within an hour and met with Peggy soon after. She was understanding and in just as big a hurry as I was to try to save my pregnancy. I burst into tears due to the hormones and pure relief that someone who could actually help was going to do everything possible. By that evening, results were back. Low progesterone. I had my prescription filled and all has been good since. More than good. Peggy and her staff have made room in the schedule whenever I needed to get in, scheduled ultrasounds to keep an eye on our little guy... they've been great.
No, we didn't choose the middle name Peggy :) but we did choose Hayes, Peggy's last name. Obviously we think very highly of Peggy, but just as I told the whole story here, using her last name as our son's middle name will allow us to share the whole story with him. Had badly we wanted him, the loss we experienced prior to being blessed by him and God's hand in it all. What was it that made me call all those doctors and then Nicole rather than just sit by? How was it that I had a friendship with someone whose aunt would take the time to run the tests? It's all such a God thing.